colleen on... pre cana

Colleen and KurtWedding Date: July 21, 2012

How They Met:I first met Kurt at the Osprey in Manasquan in the Summer of 2008. He challenged me to a dance off right in the middle of the dance floor. We reconnected again in the Fall of 2009 at a Rutgers University Football Game. From the minute our conversation began, I felt a connection. He was so easy to talk to and I thought he was sooo much fun. At first I was reluctant to date him because I had met him through my brothers. However after some time, I decided to give it a shot. We began dating in January 2010.How He Popped the Question:He proposed on July 16, 2011 at a restaurant by his lakehouse in Northern NJ. The proposal was just the first suprise, we came back to the lakehouse and friends and family from both sides were there to greet us and celebrate our good news.Colleen on Pre Cana:I was born and raised Catholic. However in the past 12 years I rarely attended mass and strayed away from the Catholic faith. My fiancé, Kurt is a devout Lutheran and is very dedicated to his church community. However, at my mother’s request, we are having a Catholic Wedding Ceremony, which means we are required to go through Pre-Cana. Kurt was on board from the beginning, considering he really didn’t have another option :)Kurt and I had our initial meeting with the priest and we were asked questions such as "Are you related?" and "Is Kurt ordained?". These questions called upon laughter and furthered my belief that this entire process must be a hoax.The next steps threw a curve ball my way. We met with a married couple and took a compatibility test on a scantron form (kind of like the SATs), otherwise known as the Focus Test. Kurt and I returned two weeks later to discuss our answers with the couple. The test and the discussion of our answers was wonderful- in that it invoked conversations every couple should have before marriage: finances, household responsibilities, children, in-laws, relationships with friends, community involvement. My biggest fear was that it would be a test of Catholicism, which I would no doubt fail! To my pleasant surprise there was nothing on the topic.We furthered these discussions at an all day retreat with about 15 other couples getting married in the Catholic faith. It was nice to share experiences, challenges, and charming stories with couples that are going through the same process. The all day retreat also included 7 married couples who graciously donated their time to share life experiences with us- both good and bad.The entire pre-cana experience opened both of our eyes to the fact that marriage is not always easy, but the training equipped us with the tools to get through any challenging situations that we will face in our life. More important, it reinstated why we are getting married- because we found the person, partner, and best friend we want to share our life with.

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